Life Kinda Sucks - Be Kind to Yourself

At the end of every therapy session, my therapist always asks, “So, what are your takeaways from our session?”

I love this question because through all of my rambling, I am usually able to pick the most prominent themes of the discussion and use them for my growth going forward. Don’t get me wrong, my growth is not always linear, and sometimes the takeaways have been taken away before, but I am always proud of myself nonetheless for realizing my patterns.

In any case, my therapy session today was all about being present in the moment. Ironically so because it wasn’t until the very end of the session where I got that aha moment – I haven’t been living in the present for quite some time! In fact, it may have been some weeks now where I have been subconsciously avoiding the conversation altogether. I think I know why, but that’s another conversation for another day.

During my time with my oh-so-patient therapist, I managed to spend all of my time talking about the past, and how I wish I could move forward from it; and the future, and how I don’t know if I’m ready for it yet.

It’s almost as if I were afraid of acknowledging the present.

And thus, because of my constant state of reflection of what’s happened in the world and its affect on my mental health and anticipation for what’s to come in regarding to racial injustices, I have been withholding something very important from myself: the beauty the now. While life may be rearing its ugly head, I am still a member of this earth and I deserve to recognize myself for where I am, who I am, and the journey that led me to this current place.

That’s what I want to talk to you about.

We have been in a constant state of change, chaos, uneasiness, uncertainty, and dare I say, dread. But there is no surprise there with all that’s been happening in the country lately. We have the presidential election looming over our heads, the worldwide coronavirus pandemic and the fear of life as we know it gone for the foreseeable future, unarmed Black bodies piling up from police violence, a war on civilians in numerous states for their participation in protests, children being kidnapped, trafficked, and sold for sex, and… well, the list could go on, but I’d rather not.

But then we have to think about what’s happening a little closer to home. Mental health issues are on the rise, people we know and love are dying from the virus and other ailments, we are either losing our jobs or working harder and taking a pay cut, we are working from home or doing our best to survive in the office, our family and friends’ true colors are showing on social media, our churches aren’t doing enough with their platforms, our schools aren’t provided with sustainable resources; again, this list could go on... but what’s the point? Life kind of sucks for everyone right now, in some shape or form.

All of this to say… the collective We understand that you may not be the You that you are used to being. And it’s perfectly normal to want to understand why we are in this place, how we got here, and what our future holds. And unless you have the power of future telling – which, if you do, please see me – it’s critical that you enjoy the now, and be thankful that you have it in your possession. It’s also imperative to allow yourself some grace to process life for what it is now, and grieve for the life that we once knew. Be kind to yourself.

We don’t know what will happen tomorrow, next week, next month, or even next year. But what can provide you with that peace of mind is that you are here now. Life is happening… and time isn’t something that we can hold on to or take back.

If you are still here and reading this, you know that there is a greater purpose within you. You must take advantage of the now; use it for good, use it for the needy, use it for justice.

Be in the now, bask in it. You deserve it.

Love,

Autumn